Matt Moore’s restroom etiquette came under tough scrutiny following an awkward exchange early Tuesday afternoon. The incident occurred at Moore’s place of employment after Moore, returning from a break, stepped into the main restroom to wash his hands in accordance with state law. Upon entering the restroom Moore experienced the stank equivalent to being ‘kicked in the face,’ and gingerly circled in front of the latrine, hoping his presence would trigger an automated ‘courtesy’ flush. The good mannered gesture only triggered Moore’s automated gag reflex as he came upon a scene, which can only be politely described as a ‘proper mess.’ Realizing no number of flush-passes could restore order to the ‘porcelain kingdom,’ Moore concluded a prompt exit and report to the proper protective glove-wielding authorities was the most appropriate course of action.
The situation became further ‘irregular,’ as Moore opened the door to find a patron anxiously waiting to utilize the facility. Moore, realizing he was in a lose- lose situation, opted to say nothing and let the patron come across the scene first hand, rather than sound ‘ultra fake’ and claim that he didn’t ‘do it.’
Moore remained out of direct eyesight throughout the patron’s prompt re-admittance onto the main floor and until the patron exited the premises. The cause for Moore’s elusive maneuvers were to simply, “Avoid further unwarranted shameful sentiments… and laughter.”
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